Am I..?

                         "It's a sickening feeling that never seems to wash away."  - Baybedow

                         There are times in the day, I just want to grab my bag & listening to my converse pound against the pavement while tears spill down my face. I just feel like there is never a solution to what I am. Is it wrong for me to be ashamed of what I am? I'm always too busy protecting everyone else around me to even solve what's wrong. Some nights, I really just want to spill out the door and run as far away I can to forget everything I've done. I don't want to be touched by my friends. I feel as if their too nice to me. The ends of my eyes tilt downward because I'm scared of who I am. My stomach twists and turns fearing that one day, I'll just be over come by my feelings of hatred to myself and  just die off into obscurity. I've felt so down lately, but I can't tell anyone how I feel. It's a secret I'll keep to myself..